Earlier this week, my sister sent me a text that made me smile.

"Ya know…I was just thinking about your company and I might be a success story lol. I literally did several things this year I've been dreaming of doing for at least 20 years. Dang I'm old."

Then, almost immediately:

"Now I gotta start planning my townhouse and homeless community…"

In fact, have a look for yourself…

My sister and I talk every morning while I'm on my 4 mile walk. We've been doing it for about a year now, so I've heard most of what she wants for her life and what she'd like to see change.

Some mornings I'd encourage her. Other times I'd remind her of something she told me months earlier, or push back a little when she came up with all the reasons something wouldn't work.

Neither of us thought of those conversations as anything other than two sisters talking in the morning.

Looking back over the last seven months, though, I can see what was happening. Little by little, she was changing things.

She bought her first investment property on her own, a condo she completely gutted and renovated. And when I say gutted, I mean she took this thing apart. I watched the whole process, and now it's a beautiful place that barely resembles what she started with.

She also got her real estate license, something she'd talked about for years because eventually she wants to become a broker and buy more properties…and did I mention that she’s paid off the entire thing, including the renos.

All of that happened in seven months. And none of it started because something was wrong.

Her life was actually pretty good. She has a great job, owns a beautiful home in the suburbs, is in a loving relationship, and her kids are healthy and doing well. She was just starting to feel a little bored with the life she was living.

And that's an interesting place to be in, because usually when we start talking about changing something, there's a reason. Something happened.

You had a relationship end or experienced a loss of some kind or you realize the job isn't working out anymore. Usually, something in your life has gotten uncomfortable enough that you know you need to deal with it.

But what happens when none of that is true?

Because nothing had happened to my sister. There was no crisis when we started having these conversations. She wasn't trying to get out of a life she hated.

She would just mention something she'd always wanted to do, or something she could see herself doing one day, and I'd say, “Okay, so why aren't you doing it?”

Then we'd talk about that.

The real estate class was its own lesson. She kept trying to take it online but she would time out and never finish, and I kept telling her to stop trying to make the online thing work and just go take the class in person.

Eventually, she did.

And guess what, when she showed up, she was the only person registered for the entire two-week class.

So after all that time trying to figure out the most convenient way to do it, the in-person class ended up being pretty convenient anyway. It was just her and the instructor, so most nights they finished early and she got individual attention that allowed her to ace the test.

Two weeks is all it took and she was done…20 years later.

And I remember saying to her, All that time you spent trying to figure out how to do this, and now it's done.

And that's what makes a life that's fine so easy not to examine. Because nothing is forcing you to look at it.

Sometimes we just have to decide to look.

There's something visceral about wanting more that can make us feel a little ungrateful, especially when life is generally good.

If you have a good job, healthy children, a home you like and people you love, it can feel strange to say, “Yeah, but there's something else I want too.”

Because, I mean, what's the problem then?

Maybe there isn't one…and that’s ok.

I've never really bought into the idea that every comfortable part of our lives is evidence that we're settling. Sometimes comfortable is exactly what we worked for. Sometimes a boring Tuesday where nobody needs anything from you and nothing has gone wrong is a pretty freaking good Tuesday.

In fact, there are probably things in all of our lives that we could look at right now and say, “Nope. I'm good here.”

But being good with what you have doesn't mean you stop being curious about what else you might want.

That's what I've watched happen with my sister. She kept her job while she got her real estate license. She still has her house in the suburbs and now she has the investment condo downtown. She didn't have to decide that something was missing from her life before she was allowed to want something else for it.

She just made room.

And honestly, I like that way of thinking about “more.” That’s my kind of living.

It doesn't always have to mean instead.

Sometimes there's room for the thing you already love and the thing you've been thinking about for years.

And fine really is fine.

There are seasons when ordinary feels wonderful and things in our lives that don't need to be optimized or turned into something bigger.

And yes, you can examine your marriage, your work, your home, or the way you've chosen to live and decide, Yep. I'd choose this again.

But examination can also show you that appreciating what you have and wanting something else are not opposites.

We're at the beginning of a new quarter, which usually means somebody is about to tell us there are only three months left in the year and we need to finish strong.

I'm not really interested in doing that…(unless you are, and in that case hit me up for 1:1 coaching using the link below).

What I am interested in is taking a closer look at the life that's already here, especially the parts we don't think much about because they're working.

Most of us are pretty good at examining the things that hurt. We think about the relationship that's struggling or the money that isn't quite working. Those things tend to stay on our minds because they haven't given us much choice.

But how often do we examine the things that are fine?

When was the last time you really thought about the job you've had for years and asked yourself if it still fits the life you want? Or looked at how you spend your weekends and wondered if you actually enjoy them?

Now, this is where it gets interesting. Because examination doesn't have to end with change.

You might take a good look around and realize, I really like this. You'd choose the same home. You'd stay in the same career. You'd keep spending Sunday mornings exactly the way you do now.

That's good information.

But you might also notice something you've stopped asking yourself about. Maybe something that made perfect sense five or ten years ago still works, but you wouldn't necessarily choose it the same way today. Or maybe you would keep all of it and simply make room for something you hadn't considered before.

That's what I want to take into this new quarter. Not a list of everything I need to accomplish before December 31, but a willingness to look at the life that's already here and make sure I'm still choosing it.

Maybe that's the better question as we settle into this next season. Not What do I need to change about my life? but something much less loaded:

What else could fit here?

This week, I want you to examine something in your life that's working.

Don’t focus on the obvious problems. We spend plenty of time thinking about those.

Choose something that's fine exactly as it is and give yourself a few minutes to really look at it. If you changed nothing about it, is there something you would still like to experience alongside it? Something you've been curious about, talking about, or quietly imagining that you've never given yourself a real reason to pursue?

You don't need to turn it into a goal this week or decide what you're going to do about it.

For now, just notice whether there's more room in your life than you've been giving yourself permission to use.

I think sometimes we wait for life to give us a reason to change something.

We wait until something makes staying where we are harder than doing something different.

But my sister's story has reminded me that it doesn't always have to happen that way.

Sometimes nothing is wrong.

Sometimes you really do like the life you've built, and there's still something you've been thinking about for years.

You don't have to make what you already have smaller in order to make room for it.

My sister had a good life seven months ago. She has a good life now. The difference is that a few things she spent years talking about are finally part of the life she's actually living.

Nothing had to go wrong for her to decide she wanted more.

Donteacia 💛

P.S. I, too, decided I had room for more…stay tuned for that update.